Earth's Favourite Ethnic.

As the shimmering blue sky began it’s premature descent to a place somewhere behind autumns clouds, the bats began to emerge from their homes again. Their screeches and cries echoed through the caves and forests in which they dwelled.

They would cause an infinitely unsettling ruckus everywhere and anywhere they could. They would eat all the berries, bite and scratch all the children, get stuck in chimneys and leave their droppings all over the place!

The townspeople had finally had it up to ears with the bats. They had enough problems to deal with before having to worry about all which the bats brought with them.

The choice was hastily made. The bats had to go.

The only question left was “How?”

A brief meeting by the cosy village would conclude with the decision; the bats would be chased to the bluffs above the town. There they would be pecked to death by a flock of awaiting eagles. Always hungry, always readily preying.

The villages dawned their torches and arrows, herding the bats through the hills and up the mountains. The bats fled for their lives, right into their awaiting trap.

There reached a point in the cliffs where the villagers wouldn’t dare go further. But it didn’t matter, the bats’ fate was indeed sealed. They marched back down to their homes as the little black menaces flew upward.

Upon returning to their town, an immediate celebration followed. After all, they were ecstatic! No longer would they ever have to worry about the problems brought by the bats.

It wasn’t until some time into their gathering, they realized that not once had they heard the frequently graceful chatter or joyous giggles of the children playing. It was, however, getting quite late. It was most likely they had simply wandered wearily to their beds.

The celebration lasted well into the morning. It wasn’t until the first few rays of dawns’ glorious sunshine that they heard a child making any noise at all.

The child, with clothes so tattered and torn, told a tale of a town so preoccupied with hatred. A town so preoccupied with chasing a flock of birds, so proud of themselves, that behind a wall of jeers and chastising..

Not one would stop to look as they turned their backs on their own offspring running up the cliff, behind the birds, surely to an I’ll conceived fate.

The village fell silent. Not thinking, not acting. Simply standing. Standing still, staring at the sky.

As they all gazed upward, to the bluffs they had not long ago praised, a cluttered mess of black feathers and torn clothes fell from the sky. Showering them all in a slowly falling storm of sadness..

A Rock, A River, A Tree
Hosts to species long since departed,
Mark the mastodon.
The dinosaur, who left dry tokens
Of their sojourn here
On our planet floor,
Any broad alarm of their of their hastening doom
Is lost in the gloom of dust and ages.
But today, the Rock cries out to us, clearly, forcefully,
Come, you may stand upon my
Back and face your distant destiny,
But seek no haven in my shadow.
I will give you no hiding place down here.
You, created only a little lower than
The angels, have crouched too long in
The bruising darkness,
Have lain too long
Face down in ignorance.
Your mouths spelling words
Armed for slaughter.
The rock cries out today, you may stand on me,
But do not hide your face.
Across the wall of the world,
A river sings a beautiful song,
Come rest here by my side.
Each of you a bordered country,
Delicate and strangely made proud,
Yet thrusting perpetually under siege.
Your armed struggles for profit
Have left collars of waste upon
My shore, currents of debris upon my breast.
Yet, today I call you to my riverside,
If you will study war no more.
Come, clad in peace and I will sing the songs
The Creator gave to me when I
And the tree and stone were one.
Before cynicism was a bloody sear across your brow
And when you yet knew you still knew nothing.
The river sings and sings on.
There is a true yearning to respond to
The singing river and the wise rock.
So say the Asian, the Hispanic, the Jew,
The African and Native American, the Sioux,
The Catholic, the Muslim, the French, the Greek,
The Irish, the Rabbi, the Priest, the Sheikh,
The Gay, the Straight, the Preacher,
The privileged, the homeless, the teacher.
They hear. They all hear
The speaking of the tree.
Today, the first and last of every tree
Speaks to humankind. Come to me, here beside the river.
Plant yourself beside me, here beside the river.
Each of you, descendant of some passed on
Traveller, has been paid for.
You, who gave me my first name,
You Pawnee, Apache and Seneca,
You Cherokee Nation, who rested with me,
Then forced on bloody feet,
Left me to the employment of other seekers—
Desperate for gain, starving for gold.
You, the Turk, the Swede, the German, the Scot…
You the Ashanti, the Yoruba, the Kru,
Bought, sold, stolen, arriving on a nightmare
Praying for a dream.
Here, root yourselves beside me.
I am the tree planted by the river,
Which will not be moved.
I, the rock, I the river, I the tree
I am yours—your passages have been paid.
Lift up your faces, you have a piercing need
For this bright morning dawning for you.
History, despite its wrenching pain,
Cannot be unlived, and if faced with courage,
Need not be lived again.
Lift up your eyes upon
The day breaking for you.
Give birth again
To the dream.
Women, children, men,
Take it into the palms of your hands.
Mold it into the shape of your most
Private need. Sculpt it into
The image of your most public self.
Lift up your hearts.
Each new hour holds new chances
For new beginnings.
Do not be wedded forever
To fear, yoked eternally
To brutishness.
The horizon leans forward,
Offering you space to place new steps of change.
Here, on the pulse of this fine day
You may have the courage
To look up and out upon me,
The rock, the river, the tree, your country.
No less to Midas than the mendicant.
No less to you now than the mastodon then.
Here on the pulse of this new day
You may have the grace to look up and out
And into your sister’s eyes,
Into your brother’s face, your country
And say simply
Very simply
With hope
Good morning.

— Maya Angelou.

I’m sitting in an upstairs apartment turned salon waiting for my father to get his hair cut. Frankly, I don’t know why he doesn’t just shave it off. It’d suit him. Bald heads always suit fat people. I’ve seen the movies, I know the deal.

I unknowingly looked a little bored. Understandable? I’m waiting for my dad to get his hair cut for fucks sake.

Anyway..

The young lady behind the counter saw me dimwittedly gawking at the conditioners and aromatic gels sitting in the display case doing nothing but gathering dust.

She pulled a couple of magazines from the knee high tall stack on the floor, walked around from her desk and handed them to me.

Politely of course, I said thank you and took them.

I took a little time to flick through the pages of the thicker one.

I got about seven or so pages in before stopping to think, “Who are these people? And why do I care?”

I think these magazines are from the UK.

I didn’t read a single page.

I find it a little offensive, that someone thinks I need to know what any of these little douchebags half way across the globe, having no impact on my life at all, are doing with their free time.

There’s a new lady at the counter now. She looks like an islander, although I’m sure she’s not. Actually she just got up and left.. ‘said something about having another appointment.

As always, I lost my shit when I saw her. I have this animal fucking lust for pacific island girls. Actually, brown chicks in general. I’m not sure why, but it’s absolutely and totally primitive.. Just one of those things I can’t control.
Can you blame me?

I can hear birds outside. I’ve seen so many different kinds of birds since I’ve been here. I think that’s one of those things about traveling that really makes you feel like you’re away from home; when you see birds you’ve never seen before. That and, well.. Living out of a fucking suitcase.

Birds are cool. Most animals are.

It’d be nice not to have responsibilities. Animals have very few and man, I dig that.

I think it’s cool how they have no concept of time. Like, in the sense humans do anyway.

No midday. No 3pm. Just ‘hungry?’, ‘not hungry’, ‘asleep’ and ‘awake.’

That’s damn cool. I could really dance to that beat.

Y’know what’s really amazing? When you hear about cats and dogs hanging around the back of restaurants at specific times everyday, in promise of food.

That really throws my mind around. What happens when there’s a public holiday or something like that? Do they still go down to their respective buffets? I bet they love it.

Anyway.. Whatever, I’m going to go back to the magazine.

jungle-mayhem asked: How do I dress up as your dick for Halloween my funny little friend?

glitter. lots of glitter.

Sitting silent on sandy shores
Basking contently in the wonder of natures rapport.
A mild breeze blows.
The giants appear.
Mother Ocean’s call beckons.
And to it, I adhere.
At a loss for words, content with nothing. Her fearsome bellowing sustains the humming.
Off into the abyss I so bravely stride. The water washes away the pain and the voices begin to subside.
Surging ahead, the sets begin to crumble. An entity in itself, with a power so humble. Enough to claim whatever she wants, the goal is my soul. Spinning back to the front.
engulfed so warmly in a fountain of pleasure. Slowly leaves the light, from the barrel of terror.
Disregard ambition.
Disengage from emotions.
Distance the early echoes from the handed down demotions.
Nothing fierce and Nothing fancy.
No more devilish romancing.
Engulfed throughout and far below in the endless nothings undertow.
No more crying
No more malice
No longer leader of the palace.
Once left alone to love alone
And leave behind my concrete throne.

Only afraid for a minute, she enjoyed the unpredictable clashing in the sky. She had never been too fond of rain, but it seemed to set the mood.

She began to doze off whilst the boys giggled to themselves at their strikingly unfunny jokes. But she didn’t care. It was nice to be in their company. And the company of the thunderstorm.

Blink by blink her soft pale eyelids were getting harder and harder to keep open. “I’ll just close them for a minute.” she murmured, succumbing to their heaviness.

The thunder and lightning were creeping closer by the second. Getting louder and deeper. An unspoken feeling of exhilaration smothered the car. The boys hearts began to beat faster. Isolated droplets of sweat were running down their necks and foreheads as they waited for the next horrific strike.

A thunderous clang made it’s way soaring from the heavens. It’s heaving was so persistent it could almost be confused with faint laughter. Maniacal laughter.

She jolted upright in her chair from the semi relaxed position she bore previously. The car was quiet. In fact, everything was quiet. Bar the rain, sky and crying of the seventeen stray cats in the distance ofcourse.

She gazed over at the rather handsome boy next to her. He sat perfectly still, dawning a somewhat expressionless face, gazing up through the front window at what appeared to be, under first impression, an electric chair in the sky.

The gang sat there, looking forth. An almost erotic sensation overcame them. Tingles, one might call it. As if the lightning was the result of the thunders ejaculation.

But I digress..

The mauve and navy clouds moved further and further apart, almost as if a show were about to start. The puzzling sight became more and more visible with each of the lightnings strikes. They were sure it was a chair.

An electric chair.

The cats had fell silent.

The chair stood in the sky, shaking only minorly from what would have been gale forced breezes pushing and pulling at the rigidly built piece of furniture. It stood sort of tilted, almost as if it was facing the car.

The vision was accompanied by what seemed to be the soundtrack for the fierce storm.

Thunder thumping rhythmically, as if it were a marching band. The lightning crackling as it fell from the sky, taunting ther eardrums with it’s seductive three tone screeches.

None could move. Frozen absolutely stiff. The sheer spectical had them in such a trance.

The lightning strikes were getting louder. And closer together. The girl managed to move her head. Only lowering it a few inches.

She managed to let out a small gasp, which the boys managed to hear in between the thunders slow and repetitive beating.

They all sat staring, directly foward, at the giant skyscrapers and mountains in the distance. All set in a humongous blaze, turning wonders into dust.

The lightning frantically struck faster.

The thunder all the while beating it’s bellowing drums.

They could all see the lightning getting closer. With what could only have felt like a cosmic amount of zen, they had accepted their fate.

Achieving nirvana, the two in the front seats managed to move their hands closer together, eventually holding each others firmly.

The lightning was mere feet away.

For a moment, there was no noise at all.

Before an eerie light surrounded them.

Their spinal chords nearly shattered by the mind-blowingly loud slap to accompany the light.

The light surrounded them for what felt like time was standing still. The thundering beats eventually getting further and further apart until it was but a faint noise in the distance.

For a little while, each presumed themselves blind. It wouldn’t have been surprising given the occurance.

Deeming the rest of their lives results of a horrific storm, their already unforeseen futures were now to be riddled with hurdles they couldn’t have imagined facing. They all passed out from the load of stress that had just all of a sudden been placed upon their shoulders.

After some time of dreaming she was in her pajamas at home, spending her evening braless and retouching photos, her eyes began to open. The boys were shaking her, pleading with her to wake up.

She discovered that her sight hadn’t been lost, well.. Maybe temporarily.

It should have been a joyous moment but neither of the boys had a smile on their faces. She arose from her chair.

The door opened and they slowly stepped out of the car. It surprisingly didn’t appear to have any damage at all. At once they wished they could say the same for themselves.

A rather large town stood infront of them, just beyond a small valley.

It was all too easy to figure out that they were anywhere near the libraries car park their night began in. Not a single thing looked familiar. Not even the sky.

It was quite a sunny day. Only two or three clouds in the sky as far as any of them could see.

Left with very little patience, astonishment or questions to repeat to eachother, of which they all knew that they had no answers for.. Their only real option at this point was to go to the town.

Unfortunately, the cars battery had died. So a walk was in the cards.

The valley had a familiar scent.

The fresh air was somewhat unfamiliar to her. She had always lived north of the city, populous with colorful, tighlyt knit neighborhoods and ever buzzing streetlights. Alas, she had rarely ventured away from the denser areas. She enjoyed the sculpture and sharp architecture of the city’s skyscrapers, especially in front of the moon.

There was a slight breeze blowing. She walked through it almost as if it wasn’t there. Her eyes squinting adorably as small particles of angeldust were thrown in her face.

After mindlessly marching for what seemed like a decade they had finally reached the towns foot. Upon entering, they discovered all the houses this side of town were empty, due to the area being only newly developed.

The streets were bare too, but it wasn’t by any means quiet. The premise of a bustling main street was made apparent by the honking horns and and constant chatter in the distance.

The crew knew without speaking where they were heading. The call of civilization’s beckon was too tempting not to be drawn in.

With every street she walked through, she grew more and more tired. Each of her little strides began to take more and more effort. She regret wearing her heels, as gorgeous as they were, they had proved to be a bad choice.

Once reaching what appeared to the the main district, they were the victims of some harshly unsettling looks. The locals were aware immediately of their unfamiliarity.

She noticed promptly the lack of skyscrapers. Infact, a lack of buildings over two stories tall. Bar ofcourse the clock tower, shadowing the entire town in all is massive glory.

Atop the mighty time-keepers overcast stood a liberty bell, easily twice her size. She stood still, all the while squinting in sheer amazement.

As if fate had decided it, the bell was struck. Ringing and ringing with no sign of stopping.

..dong ..dong ..dong..

A storm was approaching. She could see it in embellish the horizon line and spread across the sky like dye through water.

The town as an entirety, without any hesitation retreated to their homes and inside their storefronts without so much as breaking a sweat.

The three knew they too would need to seek shelter from the melodic nightmare in the sky daunting over them.

Amass the confusion they stumbled somewhat blindly into a lonely tavern. Eerily empty. Not a soul was present. Through the windows, riddled with posters they saw the colossal mauve and navy clouds trapping every square inch of blue behind it’s magical onslaught. Almost as if it were magic.

Forward gazing they stood. Not one uttering even the slightest wimper. Their eyes locked firmly on what they knew was to be the unforgettable horror unfolding infront of them.

The lightning ran rampant, striking houses and roads. On statues and ornaments went, exploding towards the sky in fiery bursts that seemed to linger well after the events.

Having to re-live the pain, her head began to pulse. That rhythmic beating she heard once before was Clawing at her mind fiercely.

The thumping got louder. She clutched at her head before doubling over in pain. It ultimately proved too much for her. She passed out. The boys all the while holding her, worried for her life as well as theirs.

The storm continued. It continued for hours. Tearing apart houses and trees. Seemingly at random. Fueled by it’s malicious battery.

The boys hearts pumped to the beat of the storm. Nonetheless, they were brave.

..Some time had passed before the storm decided it was time to pass and move to the next set of lives it would claim.

She once again awoke to the sight of the boys leaning over her, pleading with God for her life. As haunting as it was, it was nice to see something familiar.

This time there were a few more faces, however, none of which she seemed to recognize. Her mind was beginning to crumble.

The faces were simple. None seemed surprised by, what they knew, of the outsiders who had appeared in their humble and developing township.

Her mouth was dry. Her lips were sticky and chapped under her lusciously red lipstick. It felt oddly nice.

She lay there sweating. Her body quite unwilling to move. She wasn’t even sure whether to bother. There was a good chance that she was hallucinating. After all, she did just get struck by lightning.

Thoughts sprinted through her head of wishing she was invisible, even just for a minute, to get a better understanding of the situation as a whole and just precisely come to terms with what was going on.

The town outside and through the windows was in shambles. Measly fluttering ruins of what was once a half decent civilization. It’s inhabitants casually continuing their day as if it were any other. Not an emotion on a single ones face. Not a frown, not even a smile.

The boys helped her to her feet. She could hardly stand let alone find the strength to get up.

The heaving nature of her head had her dizzy and warm.

Everyone in the room, like their free-roaming counterparts outside, continued to wander along the paths of their day to day lives as if nothing had happened.

This all seem too strange to the amigos. They were lost in what appeared to be a primitive, pleasureless parallel dimension.

She innocently came to complete consciousness before walking up to a lady staring blankly at anything and everything infront of her. The kids finally saw a hint of humanity in the townspeople within the lady’s face.

She looked tired. So tired. As if she hadn’t slept in who knows how long. Days, months.. Ever?

The lady wouldn’t respond to any of their movements or hesitant calls. The boys gently placed their hands on her shoulders and waist comfortingly, in preparation for a slight nudge or even innocent shake.

The woman was cold. Ice cold. She didn’t move an inch. Absolutely rock solid.

Both were startled and frightened. A taste of death had just been spoon fed to them by the unjust hand of mother nature from a dish of cruelty and sorrow.

Their attention was quickly thrown in lieu of the vagrant cries for help from where was clearly nearby.

Moreso eager to find the shrieks, they had immediately forgotten about the walking corpse next to them. All three sprinted as fast as they could in the sound’s direction, the girl moving as fast as the boys despite her enormous heels. Like a common streetwalker.

Upon reaching the sounds source, which they could tell was echoing from underneath a large heap of rubble Covered by a building that had been torn apart mere minutes earlier, the boys were quick to jump atop the waste and cypher their way through the horrendous mess for any signs of civilized life.

They all cautiously stepped backward. Standing before the steel and brick nightmare.

The rubble at last was shifted, what was underneath shone forth a bright luminously golden aura. So bright but not blinding in the slightest.

She once again reached for the drivers hand, tightly clutching at it like an infant to their blanket. She was scared but too intrigued to care.

His warm grip quelled any senses she was feeling of terror and unsafety.

A hand emerged from the rubble.

And soon after strongly maneuvering itself upward it unveiled a perfect specimen of man.

Long blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes stood atop the seven foot tall athletically muscular body, wrapped only in a short tunic from his waist to knees.

Staring forth in amazement, they saw he was clutching tightly to a golden harp..

With a single halo like golden circular crown hovering just above his long, striking locks.

They instantly knew.

He was an angel.

His back had been quite severely severed from what was probably the passing storm.

He spoke..

“Be not afraid, my children. I thank you.” He said with an obvious sense of pride.

“I thank you for helping me. I would surely have never been able to escape from that torture all by myself.

I can see what you are all thinking without ever having to read your minds. Please allow me to speak and tell.”

They were stunned in amazement. Hanging off his every word and very presence.

“I was flying in the sky. Too low from the kingdom, in the forbidden area. From a clear sight, came a maniacal storm! It moved faster than I could fly, and I was engulfed in the terrible rainfall.

My wings were then struck, painfully, by the burning lightning. My feathers caught a blaze and I fell.

I fell for a long time. Passing out in the sky from the pain.

Ive quite clearly landed on this building. I apologize for any damage or inconveniences I may have caused. I will leave as soon as my wings grow back and leave you all to your doings. I am unsure of how long it will take but I assure you at most it will be a cycle. One week in your time.”

She still clutched at the drivers hand. She hadn’t let go for a second and had no plan to until this ordeal was done with.

All she wanted to do was hug him and cry. This was getting too much for her.

Little did she know he felt the same. Never frightened but never calm. All the while wishing he could just hold her and close his eyes, hoping when he opened them they’d be back in the carpark.

I don’t like Facebook anymore. I haven’t for a while, really. It’s rarely I read anything interesting during the countless fucking hours I spend periodically reading the mountainous gorges of turtle shit that appear in front of me. Admittedly, I don’t write anything of substance either. I rarely even make myself laugh.

The reason being that you’ve all slowly been feeding me horrendous amounts of poison, drip after drip, by letting me into those pink sacks of diarreah you call brains. I’ve completely stopped caring and whatever little residue of inspiration I had was molested the minute I reactivated this time sapping disaster.

The ONLY reason I have this joke of a ‘social network’ is to see when sluts upload half naked bathroom shots of themselves and to find out about gigs.. Which, lets be honest, I rarely if at all go to anymore.

I don’t care about your car, I don’t care about your job, I don’t care about the vengaboys touring, I don’t care about what happened on Jersey Shore 2 years ago, I don’t care about the quote you’ve quite clearly stolen because after however many years you’ve spent on this planet being useless you cannot string together a sentence to adequately express a feeling you know nothing about, I don’t care about the pathetic plethora of videos you’ve pilfered from YouTube that always fail to make me laugh and worse yet.. Think. I don’t care if the bricklayers outside are wearing shirts and I don’t care if you’re taking a nap. I don’t care about what you’re going to do tomorrow, what you did yesterday and especially what you’re doing right now. I don’t care about what your mother made for dinner or what your cat just shat out. I don’t care about how cool you think you are and give even less of a shit about what bullshit trance club you went to on Saturday and how you have to get up sooo early on Sunday to jerk off or whatever.

Is there a point to this? Not really. There shouldn’t have to be.

I guess if there’s something to take away from this little speck in your feed, if you’re going to take anything away at all, it’s that maybe you should go outside.. Or whatever. I don’t care.